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Season 1 - Episode 6

Maria Faces Her Fears, Makes the Ultimate Commitment

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Monday, September 26, 2011

Maria Faces Her Fears, Makes the Ultimate Commitment

This was definitely one of the most memorable days of my entire life! We had this great couple, Liz and Jason, come in for a cemetery wedding. And what better way to solidify your love then to get it eternally tattooed on your arm! So I took Liz and Jason to the best tattoo parlor in New Orleans, Electric Ladyland. As they were picking out their tatts, they started asking me what I was going to get. What am I going to get? Oh no, see Maria doesn’t swing that way. I mean, don’t get me wrong, there is not a conservative bone in my body! It’s just that, I’ve always been more of a piercings kind of girl and the idea of a tattoo, of something permanently engraved on my precious, soft baby skin…well that’s always made me a little nervous. What can I say? I’ve always been a little afraid of commitment, and a tattoo – that’s the ULTIMATE commitment. I mean, you can’t divorce a tattoo. You can’t sign a pre-nup, keep separate bank accounts, and then divide the house and the kids and go your own ways. A tattoo is with you til the end, my friend. And did I mention that I’m deathly afraid of needles? I mean really scared. I mean I don’t know how heroine addicts do it, because I pass out with fear anytime someone comes within a 10 mile radius of me with a needle. No thank you, I’ll take my narcotics from a bottle in liquid form, thank you very much. Which reminds me, I’m a little thirsty…

Wait, where was I? Oh right! Tattoos! So, I kindly tried to back out of it, but Liz and Jason kept saying nothing would make them happier for their wedding than for me to get a tattoo. I needed to go clear my head, so I took a walk to the bar next door to have a conversation with an old trusted friend and therapist – Dr. Jack Daniels. The bartender had these beautiful sleeves and when I asked her who did the work she told me it was Henry at Electric Lady Land. Alright, now I’m warming up to this whole tattoo thing. I go back into the shop and find Henry waiting for me with a pencil and paper in hand and a twinkle in his eye. We work on a design. I decided to go with something that would commemorate my time with the chapel. So I chose a flaming heart with a cracked chapel bell, to me, the visual definition of romantic love. I decided to be brave and go through with it. Henry was a pro and my tattoo is absolutely beautiful. I’m totally in love with it. As a matter of fact, if I could marry it, I probably would! At first I admit I was a little nervous about my decision, but at the end of the day, I’m all about customer service and if it makes a great couple like Liz and Jason happy for me to get a tattoo, then who am I to deny them that? It’s my job after all!

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