The Juice on 'The Juice'

Busted! O.J. Simpson may spend up to 33 years behind bars.

In The Slammer

Hope he likes the color orange.

O.J. Simpson lands himself a jail sentence--and this time it has nothing to do with Nicole Brown Simpson. The ex-football star nabbed a punishment of up to 33 years in prison after being convicted of armed robbery and kidnapping.  Ironically, a Las Vegas jury delivered their verdict on October 3 - thirteen years to the day after Simpson's famous acquittal for the double murder of his ex wife and her friend Ronald Goldman. The conviction stemmed from a 2007 struggle between Simpson, 61, and two sports memorabilia dealers over items he claimed were his in a Las Vegas hotel room.  
And though Simpson offered an "I'm sorry" in the courthouse, his future--at least until he is eligible for parole in nine years--promises a wardrobe full of jumpsuits and all the mystery meat he could eat.



How Rude!

It's not a Full House for Jodie Sweetin anymore.

In addition to her bout with methamphetamine, the former child star adds a second failed marriage to her personal resume. The 26-year-old actress filed for separation from husband Cody Herpin last month, but new court documents shed details on the couple's unstable union. Apparently, Herpin, a transportation coordinator in the film industry, has been unemployed since the pair exchanged vows. "Our house is in foreclosure, our water has been shut off twice. Currently, all of our other utilities are overdue," the actress revealed in the legal papers.  
But the self-proclaimed "stay-at-home dad" tells a different story. Herpin explains that he's been on diaper duty since the couple's daughter, Zoie, was born April 12. In addition, Herpin-- who claims, "I still have no idea what this is about"-- is seeking sole legal and physical custody of the couple's daughter and spousal support from Sweetin.
Except the single mom disputes the claim, citing a heated exchange on November 17-- when Sweetin gave her second spouse news of their split. "He told me I could not take Zoie with me. He said he would call the police and report that she was abducted by me and seek sole custody."

For now, a hearing has been scheduled for February 9.

Say It Ain't So

There's no such thing as bad publicity, eh? Celebrities should know that tabloid tall tales are just a part of the biz. Except some stars hit their breaking point this week.

"I feel like telling people, 'You know what? It's none of your (expletive) business," Marley & Me star Jennifer Aniston tells USA Today. What's the big idea? Apparently, Aniston thinks it's "ridiculous" that reporters dig around for dirt on her personal life. Though it sort of comes with the territory when you date within the A-list (beau is musician John Mayer).

Rumblings of a rift between Lindsay Lohan and her DJ girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, are nothing new to the tabloids. But the notorious party girl is lashing back at the rumor mill. "They should just stop asking altogether, once and for all, if she and I are broken up," Lohan blogged on her MySpace page. "Wow, the people that make s--t up must really feel silly, embarrassed, out of stories, scr*w*d... punk'd, and so much more," she adds. OK! We get it.

And what's a week in Hollywood without a little bump speculation? Celebrity blogger Perez Hilton posted reports last week that Janet Jackson may be expecting. But Jackson's faux-baby daddy, record producer Jermaine Dupri, ain't havin' it. "Does Perez know that lying destroys the credibility of a blogger?" Dupri shot back at Hilton by way of Us Weekly. And there you have it.