"Free" Tickets Always Have Strings Attached

Q: Is it wrong to accept concert tickets from a male co-worker?

I'm 24, and I work in an office with a single guy (who looks 40ish) who's constantly offering me "free" tickets to plays, concerts, comedy shows and even the ballet. I don't know where he gets them, but he always says, "My friend had to cancel last-minute...go ahead, take them; they're FREE...invite anyone you want." I usually refuse because I feel weird about it, but he just offered me Bon Jovi tickets and my live-in boyfriend really wants me to accept, and take him, but is that a bad idea?

(Submitted by NJKat summarized above)

A: AMY: Hmmm...let me guess, this "40-ish" co-worker has never had a relationship with a woman (unless you consider a restraining order a "relationship"), loves making mixed tapes for people (even though A: they don't want them and B: no one owns a cassette payer anymore), and still lives over his parents' garage. Watch out! There's a weirdo like this guy in every office--and they're often dangerous. I'm 100% serious. Don't you remember the creepy scene in Fatal Attraction (one of my favorites by the way) where an obsessed Glenn Close is insanely clutching the opera tickets she's bought, while switching the light on and off, plotting how she's going to torture Michael Douglas. Well, you don't want to end up like Michael Douglas, do you?! I'm willing to bet this guy bought these Bon Jovi tickets specifically to try and lure you into accepting.  Then he thinks you'll feel obligated to be his friend, or even worse. Nip this situation in the bud and say: NO THANKS!!! If your cheapskate boyfriend wants to see Bon Jovi, tell him to buy the damn tickets himself.

A: JOHN: Sayings like "There's no such thing as a free lunch" become sayings because they're axioms--proven time and time again over generations. I guarantee, back in the day, your own mother had some "nice but kinda strange" guy offering her tickets to things all the time. Come to think of it, her guy probably offered her Bon Jovi tickets too! So go ask your mom. I guarantee she'll tell you to stay clear of this fella.

Think about it. What's the best possible outcome from this situation? If you accept these tickets, and you and your cheapskate boyfriend (Amy's right) go and rock out to "Blaze of Glory" and "Wanted Dead or Alive," then you'll have to thank this guy, right? That's at least one mandatory awkward conversation right there. 

Then, whenever you see him at the office, you'll feel obligated to remain just a little bit longer in any awkward conversation he initiates. (After all, he did give you those free tickets. You can't just blow him off completely.) To me, the forced chit chat alone, is a nightmare. And remember, this is the best possible outcome. For the other end of the spectrum, go rent The Cable Guy.

If you don't feel a natural pull to cultivate a friendship with a person, don't. You'll lead him on, which is much crueler than ignoring him in the first place, and you'll give yourself guilt and anxiety you don't need.