Dot Com Dating Shame

She won't tell her friends that she found her dream man online.

Q: DEAR AMY VS. JOHN:  I finally decided to try online dating. Most of the guys were disasters. But two months ago, I met my current boyfriend online, and he's amazing: smart, cute, sexy, funny, gainfully employed, etc. (I actually think I'm falling in love with him.) Then last week, we just had our first big fight because I told my friends, family and co-workers that we met while I was on vacation in Spain, which is obviously a lie. (I did recently go to Spain myself, but he's never even been!) He discovered my lie at my recent birthday party because everyone I know was asking him, "So were you in Spain for business or pleasure?" It was awkward; but he went along with it. Later, I explained that I was just too embarrassed about meeting online. But he's still furious. He says, "I just won't date a liar." What should I do?

(Submitted by deedante210, summarized above)

A: AMY:  I feel your pain Pinocchio. And I do understand how you got yourself into this silly mess. When we finally meet our "dream man," we want every little detail (including time/place/setting) to be just right. These are the key details of the great love story that we'll recount to our friends, families...and even children and grandchildren down the road. We often mold, tweak, finesse (read: LIE!) to make the story more romantic, charming -- and overall more "perfect."  "We met during court-ordered rehab" doesn't exactly have the same ring to it as "We met on a warm afternoon in Rome, as we both tossed coins--simultaneously -- into the Trevi Fountain; both of us wishing to meet our true loves that very day."  See the difference? But unfortunately, if you want this "amazing" guy to trust you again, you need to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Everyone will understand. And remember, when it comes to love it doesn't matter where or how you meet, as long as you do meet. 

A: JOHN:  So Amy, do you "finesse" the story of how we met? (For the record, it was in a smelly beer-soaked basement of a fraternity house on an ordinary Wednesday night. I only found the courage to approach her because I didn't want my jerk fraternity brother to make yet another conquest right in front of me.) If you're going to be "tweaking" our story, I want some say in how I'm portrayed in the revised version. 

I think you should say that we first met when I punched a guy out for making fun of your friend who speaks with a lisp.  Or, better yet, say our eyes met when you were in the front row at one of my band's sold-out final gigs. I was singing a slow ballad and it made you cry. After the show, you had to claw your way through a dozen groupies just to introduce yourself. I'm also OK with you saying that I jumped off my surfboard in the middle of my best run at Nationals to save you from a deadly jellyfish.

I agree with Amy. Don't be ashamed of where or how you met; it doesn't matter.