Know Your Audience

Exploring the mind of a stand-up comedian.

By Chuck Nice

I was scrolling through my menu of On Demand movies when my eyes were perked to see an unusual title: Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World. Being a stand-up comic I had no choice but to order the movie. It's not as if I truly wanted to see it, more like I was compelled to watch -- the way an oncologist would have to watch a show titled The Cure for Cancer. 

The premise of the movie is that Albert Brooks is on a government sponsored mission to find out what makes Muslims laugh, because by doing so we might better understand them culturally. He must travel to India and Pakistan to research the matter and then write a 500-word report outlining his findings. The movie never lets us know what makes Muslims laugh. That's because humor is basically the same the world over, especially in the laugh-a-minute country of Germany. In some instances the cultural differences of the Muslim world precludes the comedian's jokes from working, but when he finds himself performing for a group of aspiring comedians in Pakistan he kills. We're not sure if it's because he's funny or if it's that they are all stoned on hash... God how I wish all of my audiences were high on hash.

Even though we generally don't perceive Muslims as a barrel full of Yuks (Hey Salim, let's cut this line and then caution the complainers not to make us do something in the name of Allah) we know that all cultures have some sense of humor. I think most devoutly religious people, with the exception of Rabbis, are seen as having a limited tolerance for levity. It's rare that you'll find a lighthearted protester outside of Planned Parenthood. But that doesn't mean they don't have fun or that they dislike humor. The movie uses the search for Muslim humor as a vehicle to conduct a tour through the mind of a stand-up comic. This is why I found the movie engaging; you'd most likely find it boring, so I'll recap some of the discoveries uncovered during the film.

• Comedians are not fun people: God I wish this weren't true but it is. Albert Brooks whines his way through the entire film. Now one might think that this is just his way, but it's an accurate representation of most comedians I know.  Comedy comes from pain; I often tell people that if they want to be a Stand Up they need to start with a scarred childhood and then move on to a substance abuse problem. Comedians use this pain as a tool, so they are constantly looking for something to complain about. If you look at the underpinnings of most comedic material it's based in a complaint; My wife can't cook, my family is crazy, I'm broke, I'm black, my boyfriend or girlfriend or roommate is driving me insane - and this just from my act alone. If you ever spend a significant amount of time with a comic, most likely you'll start to think "man this guy is a downer".
• Comedians don't care about their audience, at least the good ones don't: Albert Brooks does a show in India where everyone thinks he bombed and he thinks he did just fine --  that's because years of being on stage jades you as a comedian. The underlying motivation for getting on stage is to receive the accolades of the audience, but their rejection quickly leads to a subtle loathing that causes you to persevere until you're good enough that they accept you. By that time you've settled into indifference about your audiences because you're convinced that they don't know as much about this as you do. It's called bitterness; that's why I don't kiss comedians because I'm sure they taste like salted limes.
• Comedians hate talking about other comedians: One of the government liaisons assigned to help Mr. Brooks continually asks him about his opinions of other comedians.  Mr. Brooks very curtly informs him that we don't like talking about other comics unless they're dead. There are two reasons for this; the first is that comedians are quietly narcissistic. The reason we go on stage alone is because we want all of the attention focused on us. The second reason is... oh who am I kidding there is no second reason.
• Comedians are neurotic: Comedians spend a lot of time feeling inadequate. We are constantly trying to prove to the world and ourselves that we are good enough. Even when we find success and everything in our career is going well, we're afraid to step off a curb for fear of getting hit by a train. That's how neurotic we are, we feel like we'll get hit by a train while crossing a city street.

I haven't painted a very attractive picture of comedians, myself included; but everything I have said is true in some capacity. So the next time you encounter a comedian please be kind: The ego you save may be my own.