How to Thank Your Vendors

Tipping standards and gift-giving ideas for your team of wedding professionals

By Meredith Levy and Tara Mandy
Editors of BFFBridal.com

The irony in thanking your vendors is that it's how you treat them before the nuptials that will most likely affect the level of service you receive on your wedding day. So while it's certainly appropriate to properly thank the folks who helped you pull off the party of your lifetime, remember it's the pleases, thank yous, and general gestures of politeness before the wedding that will matter most.

Still, there are certain standards in the world of tipping and gift-giving when it comes to wedding professionals. For starters, you can't go wrong with a cash tip. Period. And the people who usually receive tips include the banquet or catering manager and his or her captains, the planner (if you have one), the band or deejay, and the floral designer. The amount of a cash tip will vary with the cost of the wedding, but in general tips can start at $50 to $100 for a moderately priced deejay and soar to $1,000 or more for a banquet manager. Generally, most tips fall in the $100 to $300 range.

If giving cash feels too impersonal, it's also a lovely idea to give a gift. As with any gift, it's important not to impose your own taste on the recipient, so consider spa treatments, gift certificates to restaurants, gourmet gift baskets, or a great bottle of wine or champagne.

In the end, there is no hard and fast rule about how to thank your vendors. The appropriate way to say thank you will vary widely with the cost of the wedding, the quality of the services provided, and your own level of appreciation and generosity. But the wedding business is a very personal one, and almost every industry insider will agree that a personal thank-you note is not only appreciated but also a sign of good taste. So resist the temptation to send an e-mail or leave a voice mail, and instead express your thanks personally, in handwritten form. To keep things stylish, send your notes on stationery with your new monogram, or for the ultimate thank-you note, have one in your own handwriting engraved on a Links of London silver-plated post card.

And of course, the best thank you of all is the golden referral. So if you are happy with your vendors, be sure to spread the word!