Being of (Ultra)Sound Mind and Body

The fifth time was the charm.

By Meagan Francis

You couldn't be more surprised than me.

When I went to my ultrasound appointment last Friday, all four kids and my husband in tow, I expected to hear the same thing I always hear.

"Here is the stomach...here are the kidneys...okay, hmm...yep, looks like you're having another boy!"

So as I laid on my back, belly covered in goo, head propped up on my arm so that I could see the ultrasound screen as the technician moved the wand slowly across my abdomen, I was prepared for more of the same. As I shared in a previous post, I've always had a longing for a girl, but learned by the third "boy" that it wasn't likely to happen. And four pregnancies taught me that allowing myself to get psyched up over the idea that my body might actually produce an offspring with two X chromosomes was just a recipe for let-down. So this time around, I guarded myself carefully against thinking too much about the baby's gender at all, even as people around me swore they were picking up on "girl vibes", as if I were walking around bathed in a halo of pink light.

I guarded myself so carefully, in fact, that when I found myself looking at some decidedly un-male genitals on the screen, my first thought was "Hey, that's a funny-looking penis."

"Oh!" the technician said, her voice carefully guarded.

"Yes?"

"It looks like you're having a girl."

"Wait, what?"

Behind me, my sons and husband exclaimed with excitement while I stared, dumbfounded, at the screen. A girl? Really?

I pressed for absolute confirmation. "How good is this technology? How likely is it that you're right?"

"Well, we can never say 100%, but--" she pointed at the obvious girl parts--"This is pretty clear."

The rest of the ultrasound--brain, ribs, spine, arms and legs--passed in a blur. After I'd wiped off my slimy belly and righted myself, I walked to the car like a zombie barely taking in my surroundings. The other ultrasound techs, waiting in the reception area, cheered when they heard the news. I smiled dumbly and said something equally dumb that I can't even remember. I placed the obligatory dozen or two phone calls and kept repeating the news, not really believing it myself.

A girl?

And here's where I admit to being the world's most fickle pregnant woman. Because while I'd have felt a momentary pang over the loss of yet another dream girl if this baby were a boy, I'd have shifted gears quickly into excitement over the addition of another little guy. It would have been easy to imagine him entering our lives, joining the writhing pack of wrestlers on the living-room floor.

But thinking about this much-wanted, long-awaited girl...well, strangely, kind of freaks me out. I just can't picture her in our lives yet. I've been living in boy-land for so long...how will a little girl fit?

Don't worry, I'll get over it. To help get myself in the girly mood, I've been immersing myself in a world of adorable baby girl items, like this and this  and, OMG, this!

But don't think me strange if you see me with a dazed expression on my face for the next few weeks. It's just going to take a while for this bit of information to sink in.

Maybe, as my mother-in-law said, "I'll believe it when I see it." But in the meanwhile? Shopping is going to be fun.