Womb With A View
- About
- Womb With A View
- Talk
- Subscribe via RSS
Dealing With Pre-Birth Anxiety
Even veteran moms aren't immune to worries about their impending labor and birth.
By Meagan Francis
As of this week, I'll be 36 weeks pregnant. That means a couple of things:
1) While I'm not technically "due" yet, I'm close. Babies born from 37 weeks on are considered full-term...though given my record of going past my due dates, it's not likely I'll be looking at a 37 or even 38 or 39-week baby.
2) Whether it's next week or next month, it's going to happen. This baby is going to come out...and soon.
Frankly, the idea has me a little freaked out.
I have had short, relatively easy births so far. You'd think this would be enough to reassure me that this labor and birth will follow suit, but instead, it almost does the opposite--I worry that my fifth baby (and first girl) will throw some fluke-y wrench into the works, refusing to come out, flipping into a breech position, putting me through 48 hours of back labor, or some other unlikely or even bizarre scenario, like the baby will suddenly magically transform into twins. Twins who are as big as average singleton babies, with 17- or 18-inch head circumferences.
Even barring unexpected (or just plain impossible) events like those, the fact is that any birth--no matter how exciting and exhilarating, no matter how short or manageable the labor--is a big event that takes a lot of work. I can psych myself up with positive thinking and affirmations, but so far none of my labors have felt GOOD and I don't expect that to change this time around. Then there's all the afterward stuff--the soreness, the uterine cramps, the milk coming in, the soggy, spit-up-y, droopiness of it all. On one hand, I'm looking forward to it, because I'll have this totally fascinating new person to get to know. On the other hand, I'm sort of...well, not.
I know it's normal to have birth anxiety. In fact, I wrote an article for Pregnancy Magazine on this very topic last year (when, it should be noted, I was not pregnant) and logically I know that everything I wrote--and everything the experts advised--in the story is right on.
But emotions aren't logical, and neither is anxiety. LOGICALLY, I know that most likely everything will be fine, and this baby will follow my predictable birth pattern. Logically, I know I'll be...um, uncomfortable for a few hours, and then I'll experience a rush of adrenaline- and oxytocin-induced euphoria as I get to know my new daughter. Logically I know it'll all be worth it in the end.
There is that side of me, however, that wishes I could just fast-forward past it all and wind up at the part where I'm feeling normal again.
As it turns out, there's no such thing as being an old pro at giving birth. Most of us have worries, doubts, and anxiety, whether it's our first or fifth time. If you're pregnant with your first baby, I hope that makes you feel better. And if you've recently given birth to your fifth, I hope you'll share something reassuring with me.
By Meagan Francis
As of this week, I'll be 36 weeks pregnant. That means a couple of things:
1) While I'm not technically "due" yet, I'm close. Babies born from 37 weeks on are considered full-term...though given my record of going past my due dates, it's not likely I'll be looking at a 37 or even 38 or 39-week baby.
2) Whether it's next week or next month, it's going to happen. This baby is going to come out...and soon.
Frankly, the idea has me a little freaked out.
I have had short, relatively easy births so far. You'd think this would be enough to reassure me that this labor and birth will follow suit, but instead, it almost does the opposite--I worry that my fifth baby (and first girl) will throw some fluke-y wrench into the works, refusing to come out, flipping into a breech position, putting me through 48 hours of back labor, or some other unlikely or even bizarre scenario, like the baby will suddenly magically transform into twins. Twins who are as big as average singleton babies, with 17- or 18-inch head circumferences.
Even barring unexpected (or just plain impossible) events like those, the fact is that any birth--no matter how exciting and exhilarating, no matter how short or manageable the labor--is a big event that takes a lot of work. I can psych myself up with positive thinking and affirmations, but so far none of my labors have felt GOOD and I don't expect that to change this time around. Then there's all the afterward stuff--the soreness, the uterine cramps, the milk coming in, the soggy, spit-up-y, droopiness of it all. On one hand, I'm looking forward to it, because I'll have this totally fascinating new person to get to know. On the other hand, I'm sort of...well, not.
I know it's normal to have birth anxiety. In fact, I wrote an article for Pregnancy Magazine on this very topic last year (when, it should be noted, I was not pregnant) and logically I know that everything I wrote--and everything the experts advised--in the story is right on.
But emotions aren't logical, and neither is anxiety. LOGICALLY, I know that most likely everything will be fine, and this baby will follow my predictable birth pattern. Logically, I know I'll be...um, uncomfortable for a few hours, and then I'll experience a rush of adrenaline- and oxytocin-induced euphoria as I get to know my new daughter. Logically I know it'll all be worth it in the end.
There is that side of me, however, that wishes I could just fast-forward past it all and wind up at the part where I'm feeling normal again.
As it turns out, there's no such thing as being an old pro at giving birth. Most of us have worries, doubts, and anxiety, whether it's our first or fifth time. If you're pregnant with your first baby, I hope that makes you feel better. And if you've recently given birth to your fifth, I hope you'll share something reassuring with me.
More Sites from WE tv Digital:
WE: Women's Entertainment and the logo are service marks of WE: Women's Entertainment LLC
Copyright 2010 WE: Women's Entertainment LLC. All rights reserved.
Copyright 2010 WE: Women's Entertainment LLC. All rights reserved.
I was dreading labor more with my 5th and 6th babies, because I could remember exactly what it entailed (after all, I had done it 4 times already). And I couldn't pretend anymore that things would be different. My midwife mentioned that this was not unusual for mothers of large families.
Got through it, though - and nothing compares with holding that brand new baby in your arms!
You're much more of a pro than I am, but I highly recommend self-hypnosis as a relaxation and psyching-yourself-up technique. I am not a naturally calm person, and yet as both of my previous pregnancies drew to a close I really didn't feel much birth anxiety. I also felt remarkably calm during the labors.
I first used tapes I bought from http://hypnobabies.com/, then in my second pregnancy added a tape made by an Oak Park doula/hypnotherapist, tanya mchale (www.tanyamchale.com). One of them -- hypnobabies i think -- had a specific script called "fear release," where you conjure up everything you're worrying about with your birth and do something to destroy each fear. Sounds corny, I know, but I think it really helped. I'll be doing it again.
Thanks guys! Suburbancorrespondent, that is exactly how I feel...no more fooling myself, I know JUST what to expect, it's not novel anymore, and I really just don't feel like doing it. LOL
myfunnyfunnyfamily--hypnosis is a great idea. I've heard such good things about the hypnobabies program. Not sure I have time to train myself at this point but it is worth looking into.
My fifth birth was by far my best. Even though the baby was the biggest, he was born without problem, and very little blood.
In my experience, I bled more with girls, but there is nothing like snuggling with your lacy, pink and brown well-dressed little bundle of joy.
With my 4th pregnancy I was more nervous than the rest. I now attribute that to the extra female hormones in my system. LOL There is just something different about the pregnancy...what else could it be???? female hormones.
I was likewise very nervous my 5th pregnancy (another girl) My midwife told me that what I do is very much like some of the self hypnosis systems. I just read my affirmations over and over again during the last month or so. I write them on notecards and bring them everywhere
I go and read one or two whenever I get the chance. During labor I do not need the cards anymore because the afirmations are already in my head. So like hypnosis but no cost.
I also tried a waterbirth this last time and it was glorious! I felt that birth was easier because of the water.
Wishing you peace during birth.