Love & Money

It can be a bad thing. I lent my sister $1000.00 because she and her husband were having finacial difficulties and their 2 kids were both under 5 years of age. My mom and aunt also lent them money. Altogether they got somewhere in the vicinity of $10,000 dollars between the 3 of us. This took place about 21 years ago and the money has not been replaced. My mom is now 87 and mu aunt is 85. We all thought my sister would be honest and not do what she did. She used the money to intimidate me in respect of trying to get me to go back to visit family in Michiga (I live in Massachusetts) by using the money that I lent her. It really bothered me that she was manipulating and trying to control me with what I lent her in good faith. As a result, there has been alot of animosity in the family for what she has done. I would say to execise caution.

I've been on both sides of this issue. With friends and family members, more so family members and after being taken advantage of BIG TIME, I had to stop it. But if one of my sibs came to me and said they needed to borrow 5 bucks or 10 bucks, I'd "give" it to them without saying they had to pay it back. If they did, that's great for me but if they don't, at least I know I wasn't put into another situation of being used by a family member. That hurts when it happens. I just never expected my family members to use me but they did all the same. As far as a friend, we sold our old still in good running condition car to my best friend since the 3rd grade. We decided it was best for her to make payments on the car, $100.00 a month and we sold it to her way below the blue book price. After the first few months, she started having problems making that payment. Everything in her life was going wrong so I understood why she couldn't make the payments but once they got back on their feet and we still saw no payments, that I didn't understand so I had to ask her about it which is something I don't like to do. Meaning, if you KNOW you owe me money, I shouldn't have to go after you for it, doing so just makes me feel uncomfortable. It was suppose to take a yr to pay off that car but it took 3 yrs. Since then, we are still very good friends but I would never do a loan like that again with her or with anyone. If I know she's in need, instead of giving her the cash, I'll go out and buy her what they're in need of. Her son graduated from High School a few yrs ago and we were all so proud of him but my friend couldn't afford to throw him a grad party by herself so all of her friends helped in our own way and I've got to say, it was the best money I've ever spent!! Well, besides my own son's grad party ;) Thing is.. I'll still help out my family and friends but now, I just do it in a different way and it's done that way to PROTECT MYSELF!! Peace