You don’t have to be on Mystery Millionaire to feel the strain money can have on a relationship. While arguments are normal in a relationship, money fights can be dangerous. Studies show that couples who “disagree about finances once a week” run the risk of being 30 percent more likely to get divorced than couples that claim to only disagree about finances a few times a month. There’s really no bigger turnoff than budgeting, eh?
Prevent the worst from happening by recognizing the warning signs now.
Making More Money
Regardless of who makes more, an uneven income can cause jealousy or insecurity. If one person is taunting the other with their earning power or being stringent on budget, try to come up with a mutual plan together. Maybe the lesser earner can explore passions that will bring them more financial and creative happiness. The important thing to remember is communication: get the negative things out in the open, so you can focus on the solution.
Dealing with Debt
When debt collectors start calling or when one person tends to be freer with their credit card (or cards), money fights tend to happen more because stress is high. Instead of letting the tension tear you apart; develop a plan of attack together. Set a goal for when you want to have the cards and/or debt paid off and every time you put money toward it, celebrate in a small way or talk about the future you’ll be able to build because you’re not drowning in your debt.
Getting on the Same Budget
If one person enjoys going out for the occasional shopping trip while the other is a money-hoarding Scrooge, it’ll be no time before sparks fly – and not in a good way! But it’s okay to have different money managing personalities as long as you talk about it. Starting a budget together that includes personal money for each person is one way to begin the convo. Not only will it soften the blow to your wallet, it will also help you grow closer together as a couple.
Money Can’t Buy Love
Using money to get affection or judging how much your partner loves you based on how often they open their wallet isn’t really a recipe for a healthy relationship. A homemade meal and a card to celebrate your anniversary is just as thoughtful as roses and a five star restaurant—but if one person sets their expectations too high, disappointment can bubble up and damage the relationship. Take money out of the equation when measuring the amount of love you feel in your relationship. And if it really is a problem, just set general limits for each other when it comes to gift buying for special occasions or date night.