Dr. V Schools ‘Bachelor in Paradise’s’ Dean Unglert On Why He Sucks at Dating
Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars relationship expert Dr. V stopped by former Bachelor in Paradise star, Dean Unglert's podcast Help! I Suck at Dating. She dished on everything from the new season of Marriage Boot Camp to dating and sexting!
And so it's come to this... Much to my own chagrin, I've decided to start a podcast. After coming to the realization that I suck at dating, I'll consult experts and exes to hopefully become better at relationships and be a better human. Who knows, you might just learn a thing or two as well! Listen to "Help, I Suck at Dating" on the @iheartradio app or wherever you subscribe to podcasts [LINK IN BIO] #whydoidothistomyself ♂️
A post shared by Dean Michael Unglert (@deanie_babies) on Sep 25, 2017 at 5:42pm PDT
Starting with Boot Camp, Dr. V explained that the show is all about getting the couples to focus on a common goal - their ability to make a choice.
“We’re not trying to fix that relationship, that’s not where our stakes are. It’s about [the question]; is this the person that you should be with?” explained Dr. V. “We run the couples through a series of exercises where they are able to make choices.”
Not everyone has to be a reality star to get some valid relationship advice. She added that by watching the show, you can walk away with ways to improve communication skills and other relationship lessons. As for what makes dating different for reality stars? Apparently, not much according to Dr. V.
“Unconventional people need unconventional methods. The problems are all very similar and that’s why people love the show,” she added.
Now, reality stars may have it a little different because they are dealing with their lives being on public display.
“Reality stars that have grown up as reality stars, their sense of self is a little soft. Every reality star comes into the house as a couple, but I really do see their individual journey. A lot of times the people that have been in the public eye forever have a weak sense of self. So, I feel like it’s my job to help strengthen that sense of self. That no one can tell you who you are, how to act, who to love, how to be, and you have a boundary between you and that social atmosphere,” Dr. V said.
And when it comes to keeping your relationship fresh to avoid Boot Camp therapy? Turns out, Dr. V is a fan of sexting - talk about a shocker!
“I think that sexting is just another way to be creative and fun with someone that you love and who loves you back. I do think that with anything else, it can cause problems and it get in the way of actual true intimacy. Maybe you have the skill of sexting, but in person, you’re just a little too shy,” she explained.
So, Dr. V says get those phones out and get to texting!
Dr. V then zeroed in on Dean and gave him his own personal therapy session! Immediately picking up on the fact that Dean may have a little trouble accepting criticism and feedback from people about dating, especially his co-host Jackson, she turned the interview tables on him and asked Dean some thought provoking questions. 'What makes you suck at dating? Do you suck at just being human? Do you play too many games? Are you trying to impress the person? Not enough boundaries?'
“I put up a lot of walls in relationships. I think that I have moments of vulnerability, but overarchingly, I have difficulty opening up.”
Dr. V took Dean's words to heart and offered a solution for breaking down those walls.
“If you can’t be vulnerable, you can’t trust, and if you can’t trust, you can’t love.”
She continued to explain to Dean that taking the first step in building relationships is being able to admit vulnerabilities. Dr. V took it one step further and gave Dean a little homework, telling him to write down the things that scare him to help him become more self-aware of what makes him vulnerable. He said he would follow up and let her know how it goes! WE sure hope he does!
Listen to the full episode here!
WE can’t wait to see what other advice Dr. V dispenses when Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars airs on Fridays at 9/8c.